I dont know if it was real or in a dream
Lately waking up Im not sure where Ive been
There was a table set for six and five were there
I stood outside and kept my eyes upon that empty chair
And there was steam on the windows from the kitchen
Laughter like a language I once spoke with ease
But Im made mute by the virtue of decision
And I choose most of your life goes on without me
Oh the fear Ive known
That I might reap the praise of strangers
And end up on my own
All Ive sown was a song but maybe I was wrong

I said to you the one gift which Id adore
The package of the next 10 years unfolding
But you told me if I had my way Id be bored
Right then I knew I loved you best born of your scolding
When we last talked we were lying on our backs
Looking at the sky through the ceiling
I used to lie like that alone out on the driveway
Trying to read the greek upon the stars
The alphabet of feeling
Oh I knew back then
It was a calling that said if joy then pain
The sound of the voice these years later
Is still the same

I am alone in a hotel room tonight
I squeeze the sky out but theres not a star appears
Begin my studies with this paper and this pencil
And Im working through the grammar of my fears
Oh mercy what I wont give
To have the things that mean the most
Not to mean the things I miss
Unforgiving the choice still is
The language or the kiss